Thursday, February 19, 2009

The Biggest Loser: The Biggest Waste of Time

This came up at work one day:
Liz: "I hate 'The Biggest Loser'! Everybody cries because they're fat. 'Oh, my mom and I just can't lose weight'. There are families living in their cars, getting their kids ready for school in gas station restrooms. Why don't we see a reality show about them? These people are getting rich because they're fat!"

Me: "Yup. They write books, do paid interviews, write more books, go on crusades...."

Liz: "How do you get up to 400 pounds, anyway? Can't lose weight? EAT LESS!"

Me: "Can you imagine the money put into the food that causes someone to gain 400 pounds? Eating like that has got to cost a fortune! I bet a little of that could help these people living in their cars!"

OK, so maybe we're a little mean. I think it all stems from how sick we are of so-called "reality" television programs. EVERYONE has their own show, whether it's because you need to lose weight, are a drunken sex addict after Bret Michaels, you dance, sing, have a useless talent that is not beneficial to anyone, anywhere, or you're just simply a has-been celebrity who is out of work and are willing to be paid for twenty-four hour surveillance so you can make your monthly $24, 836 house payment.

What ever happened to the sitcom? Where are the Cosby's? The Bundy's? Where are the Seinfelds? Speaking of shows about nothing, if we're going to be subjected to reality tv in all hours of the day, I'd like to see one about people attempting to quit smoking. Now THAT would be entertaining. Let's try experiments; following around an agitated just-quit-smoking-person with a camera all day might be fairly prime time worthy. Sure, there might be a bit more violence and bleeping of curse words than say, The Biggest Loser, but I bet it would be great television.

They could outfit the camera man with riot gear, follow people in their nature habitats, all on different forms and methods of quitting.

Yeah, I started smoking when I was very young and I regret it every day of my life. I also gained close to forty pounds at one time. At this point I said to myself, "Whoa there! Something's gotta be done! This is outta control!" I do not understand how people can get upwards to 400 pounds without at some point saying, "Whoa! Outta control!"

I understand an addiction to food, I really do. More than you know. However, I have found that it's very easy to choose the right foods to munch on all night long. I work hard the next day and have maintained the same weight for about seven or eight years.

I'm not by any means comparing smoking to a food addiction but take into consideration that I cannot choose a healthier cigarette to smoke. A few extra minuets of exercise will not make up for smoking too much the day before.

This is why I believe a show about quitters would be great television. It would also show younger people what it's like to have emphysema, shortness of breath, and so on (though I KNEW smoking was bad when I started). Bring us your newbies, your ashmatics, your diseased. Bring us your carriers of lung ailments, your stinky clothed ones, your serial quitters. Bring us a show that could be quite funny, make us cry out of sadness and joy, and connect us with the characters!

Of course, a follow-up show would be a complete necessity. We could call this little gem:

I DO Want to be a Quitter!

or The Sucess of Quitting

Or....something clever. I'm not to great at word plays. Go crazy, readers. Name that show!

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