One Year Early

Jay & Silent Bob


I didn't sleep much between 1995 and 1998. I stayed up all night playing games, talking on the phone or generally tossing and turning. So I caught up on my sleep at school. Not sleeping at night would have made a difference. I would've slept through all my boring classes anyway. And the teachers didn't care, really. In most of my classes I got pretty good grades so most of them let me slide.

However I did unknowingly create the image of a burnout. There was a handful of boys that picked at me constantly and gave me the nickname Smokie. Creative, yeah? And I dressed the part, attempting to individualize myself in a world or Adidas and Nike shirts and coyboy boots. I stuck out like a sore thumb.

I went with a "grunge" look. Baggy jeans and rock & roll t-shirts. Long brown hair and a strut that said, "Don't mess with me today."
I don't know what I was thinking.

I wasn't a pothead, I swear. I'll admit that I tried it and I simply did not like it. I didn't like what it did to my thought process. It took every creative aspect in me and steered it all toward a bag of Cheetos. I hated the way it made me felt so i just didn't do it anymore. Though, my image at school was not unlike that of a movie charachter. And I just didn't really care what kids thought of me. Why fight it, I thought, I'll be outta here in no time! And I was.

To everyone who thought I was nothing more than a lazy burnout:
I went to summer school voluntarily so I could graduate one entire year early
I started my adult life one year early. I made my adult mistakes one year early and learned from them one year early. I'll have my face on a book cover while you're still struggling with your crappy job.

I hated my school so much that I took summer school by choice. My image is now?
A blue collar, hard-working smart #$% trying to jump start a career on eBay. It's honest, hard work, but somebody's gotta do it.

Hey, at least I'm not still working at the local grocery store.